nice
its nice not to be
having audio-visual
hallucinations
from days upon days
of crack-cocaine
consumption.
its nice to have
food in the fridge.
nice to stand on a ridge
& not consider jumping.
nice not to have
to hustle for a hit,
my cock in some
stranger’s mouth,
pumping.
nice not to be
detached from
my girl friend
while making love,
skied & skewered,
awkwardly humping.
Carroll just wanted to be pure.
I want to be whole ---
no more needles
in the arm,
no more
coke-smoke chimney-lung
antics.
-----------
So few people
in this world
are blessed
with the ability
to mind their
own business.
It is truly a virtue
to stay out of the affairs
of other people,
to not offer unsolicited advice
or pass judgment.
Verily, verily.
Even the most of the poets
i know don’t sit around
& discuss ideas,
or even poetry;
they talk about each other
when they’re not talking
about themselves,
that is.
-----------
i useta visit
my dad at Marlboro
bab & me & i
had a picnic once
glass gallon jar
of home made ice tea
& a couple dozen perogies
dad dropped the tea
to the ground & it exploded
& babe cried oh no
don’t ruin this
& dad & i sat on
a nearby picnic table
& smoked half a joint
that id brought
it was either autumn
or spring, a season
of attrition
& transition
i was in 7th or 8th grade
& dad got out not too long
thereafter & went from
manic depressive
in the 6 months or so
that he awaited sentencing
at home in his room agoraphobic
with the shades drawn
