extra benefits

50 year old mary
stock clerk graveyard
shift worker
wears
a phony
wrist brace
to avoid
heavy duty
duty

after 5 years
at the pharmacy
in mt emphraim
mary’s shamful
doctor
clears the fake
wrist injury
but
suddenly
mary's (perfect) index
finger on the right hand
which she writes with is
fucked up (so she says)
and splinted
and so
mary continues
light task
tasks
except
for
one night (of many)
mary was caught
working more
on the tastycake
delivery dude than
filling empty
shelves

mary was transferred
to the pharmacy in
runnemede

miraculously
mary’s finger healed
quickly and
mary was expected to
actually
work well
just her luck
mary reported
a shoplifter
slambump’d her into
a rack of hallmark cards
& accessories causing
broken ribs
so now
mary runs
the pharmacy
late at night
bound tight
around the middle
and rumor has it
she works
well on the
stroehman bread
man

 

chap sticks

i am with doug today
vw’ing along
rt 42 in the direction
of the walt whitman
bridge crossing
into philadelphia

doug has a delivery in
the area of columbus and
springfield

an 18 wheeler passes

on the side the 53’ trailer
advertises
CHAPSTICK
in big bold black letters

there must be 10 hundred billion
of those little fuggers in
that truck said doug

yea i replied
those tiny tubes
piss me off
i lose tons of ‘em with
no effort… hey
…i think
lip balm company’s
should produce those things
the size of roll-on
deodorant containers

haha that’s some big
bad dry lips chic-a-
dee…he laffed

well i was thinkin’…

o no and what’s that
caiteeedeee doug blurted hahaha-ily

well… i said… i knew this guy
who worked long hard hrs
in the hot summertime sun
road construction blacktop tar
macadam stone and
when he came home at night
he immediately darted
for the shower in
there moaning damn near
cryin’ cause between
his thighs and under the
balls were irritated raw
and chafed from
sweat …

it happens doug said tappin the tip
of my nose…

tap this .,..i said.. .. and i pointed
to my left tit –he did then
paid the 3$ toll and
we were on the
philadelphia side
the chapstick truck
in front

anyways i went on.. whatever
power is in that
balmstuff does
the trick…

ooo gimme the dope
doug said..
i cant’ wait to hear
this one…haha

well… i had him lay flat
on the bed
legs spread wide and
i’d circle lightly smear
all the blotchy parts
including under and around
the nutz fondling
them a little
he’d get a big boner but
couldn’t fuck in pain
but dammit by
morning he was
good as
a new nude…tho
it took a coupla dozen of
those little fucks to
make the magic

right said doug
say babe - do that to me
when we get back to
my place

you got chapped nuts

no but i want you to
smear me like
that…

i pointed & hollered
ooo0o.O.K. - - STOP THAT TRUCK!

 

uncle george is next ...
and i wanna beat the ever lovin shit outta my mom...
before she kills my dad
stay tooned...